August 20, 2025

Chuck Schumer, like Sen. Dianne Feinstein before him, has seen better days. Chuck can't give an impassioned speech without reading from his notes, despite being in the Senate since, probably, America was founded. And now, the icing on the cake is that Chuck is dipping his toe into prep for the upcoming 250th Birthday Celebration of America.

This week Schumer chose a pseudo-Kennedy: Caroline Kennedy's strange son, Jack Schlossberg. If you think the Kennedy clan is odd, you should get a gander at this guy. He's supposedly a lawyer. And he's definitely 32 years old. But it doesn't look like he works. At anything, except making suggestive tweets to J.D. Vance and RFK Jr's. wives.

Sicko. Schumer has Schlossberg on the planning team, it seems, to teach Trump a lesson.

"We know that Donald Trump will try to aggrandise the whole thing and make it part of him and his ego. There's no better person to push back on that than you, Jack," Schumer said on Facebook.

"And I know you will be there and make sure that when we celebrate our 250th birthday, we remember that America is a nation of justice, equal justice, of unity, e pluribus unum, of treating everybody with dignity."

Oh, boy. And we were going to party like it was 1776.

Hang tough.